Yesterday we buried my sweet, sweet baby boy. Our little bunso, Giovanni.
I love you so much Giovanni!!!!!!
Eulogy
for Giovanni Paolo+
September
1, 2012
Honestly,
I don’t know what to say. I never in my wildest imagination ever thought I
would find myself in this situation. I feel like I’m watching a sad movie and
I’m the main character. I feel like this is all a dream and I will suddenly
wake up and find Giovanni sitting beside me on our bed, waiting for me to give
him his bottle of milk.
Whenever
I look at you, pictures or at things that you used Giovanni, my tummy feels
like it’s tied in knots and there is a very heavy feeling tugging at my heart.
I guess that is what heartache feels like.
My heart aches Giovanni, that I can no longer hold you in my arms and
kiss your chubby feet or stubby hands. My heart aches, Giovanni, that I wont be
able to see your dimpled smile or hear your cute cute laugh. My heart aches
Giovanni, that I will not ever see you again reach out to me and say “Mama”
when you want to be carried. My heart aches Giovanni, that I will not see your
big eyes staring so lovingly at me again. My heart aches Giovanni and there’s
nothing I can do about it.
I
love you so much Giovanni. I always tell people that you are my sweetest baby.
From the moment you popped out of my womb and I saw you for the first time, I
could already see your kind and gentle soul. You never gave me a hard time in
all your 1 year and 9 days of life. At just 5 months you would already sleep
through the night giving me the much needed rest that I needed. You would not
cry or complain unless you were really hungry or were in dire need of a diaper
change. You didn’t mind when your Kuya and Ate would pinch your chubby cheeks
and say “you’re so cuuuuute!” or when Kuya and Ate would be so rough especially
when giving you a big bear hug. You didn’t mind when I dressed you up in a
monkey costume made of wool for Halloween, or when I would tie your then long
hair into a high ponytail making you look like a Japanese baby samurai. I love
you Giovanni.
You
came unexpectedly into our lives (just 1 year & 3 months after Ate) and
left, just as unexpectedly. But for the whole 1 year and 9 days with us, you
filled those days with lots and lots of love.
I am grateful that we got to have that special spur of the moment family
vacation in Boracay (which was a trip of many firsts for you) and especially that
we got to celebrate your 1st birthday with all our family and
friends. It was a simple celebration, but the people that mattered most were
all accounted for. It was as if you already knew you would be gone soon and so
you gave us numerous memories filled with special moments with you. I love you
Giovanni.
Seeing
all the people here and everyone that visited over the past few days, not to
mention the countless emails, calls, texts, tweets and FB messages, it just
goes to show how much you have touched people in your brief life on earth. You truly are such a special baby. So special,
that God wanted to take you early so you could already be with Him in heaven. I
am so very grateful to have been chosen to be your mama. My life is infinitely
blessed because I was able to call you mine. I thank God for giving you to me
Giovanni, even for just a short time.
I
love you so so so much my baby boy. I will never ever forget you. Please watch
over us always my little saint. I still don’t know how I will cope without you,
but I know you will help me get through everyday. See you in my dreams for now
Giovanni, until we meet again. I love you.
Love always and forever, Mama.
 |
| I love you my baby. Until we see each other again. |
